What to Read Next: Be kind
What to Read Next: Be kind
Issue #333, featuring Booth Tarkington and Charles Duhigg
A quick note before we start: There are a couple of Substacks I follow that lead their newsletter with a work of art (
& ), which is something I’ve come to really enjoy. I don’t consider myself an “art person,” so I was a little surprised by that realization. But I love the idea of celebrating art even more, so I’m going to experiment with featuring a work of art rather than my Read More Books logo. Ideally, it’ll connect to the theme of the newsletter and I’ll always include a little bit of info in the caption.Happy Friday, readers!
This week I finished two wonderful books that ultimately ask the biggest question there is: How should we live? And both, albeit in very different ways, answer with a version of: Be kind.
Charles Duhigg’s new Supercommunicators (2024) and Booth Tarkington’s Pulitzer-winning The Magnificent Ambersons (1918) were far more life-affirming than I expected. I’m happy to recommend both to most types of readers. Let’s explore ‘em a bit more.
Supercommunicators by Charles Duhigg
One of the core tenets of my employer’s creed is “Communication is oxygen.” As a fully remote company, this makes complete sense and I’ve generally only thought of it in my workplace setting. After listening to Charles Duhigg’s fantastic Supercommunicators, though, I’m thinking of that phase all the time and in regards to nearly every aspect of life.
If connection (love, friendship, community, etc.) is the goal, then communication is how we achieve that goal. It follows, then, that hardly anything is more important on a relational and emotional level than how we communicate.
Combining convincing research with powerful storytelling and surprisingly useful practical tips, Duhigg gives us a complete course on the frameworks and how-tos of being a better communicator (“better” meaning that all parties feel more connected and satisfied by the end).
Now, I said “surprisingly” in that previous sentence because I don’t tend to enjoy books like this. The psychology/self-help titles that get the most attention are almost always about productivity or making more money or whatever. But Supercommunicators is all about deepening our connection with other humans, including the people closest to us as well as those we most strongly disagree with. Nothing could be more important, so why wouldn’t we do all we can to learn more about it?
From identifying the type of conversation you’re having to realizing that every interaction has a foundational emotional element, I really learned a lot from this book and I can see myself revisiting it every handful of years. Though he’s best known for The Power of Habit, this one is probably my new favorite. I encountered a few moments of skepticism, but overall it’s very good and always thought-provoking. In our AI/online era, Supercommunicators has the potential to fundamentally change your day-to-day life.
The Magnificent Ambersons by Booth Tarkington
Only four authors have won multiple Pulitzer Prizes for Fiction: William Faulkner, John Updike, Colson Whitehead, and the very first to do it, Booth Tarkington, who won the prize in 1919 and 1922.
Tarkington’s name is probably the least recognizable of the four, though for a couple of decades he was regarded as one of the nation’s most influential authors. His stories are generally set in the Midwest and focus on status, class mobility, ambition (or lack thereof), and human connection.
The Magnificent Ambersons provides readers with one of the most unlikable main characters you’ll ever come across in George Amberson Minafer. Think Holden Caufield levels of disdain (Catcher in the Rye). Now, unlikable main characters are not necessarily my jam, but in this case I really enjoyed the story. George is so well-written as a character and so believable that any transformation — for better or worse — felt utterly real.
I’m always impressed when an author can convincingly write an unlikable character without any semblance of caricature. No person is all good or all bad, but plenty of distasteful characters in literature are shallow creations that feel entirely contrived.
The story itself is about the Amberson’s family fortunes and their slow descent from upper-class living to financial ruin. Rather than rags to riches, it’s riches to rags. How does George respond? How does his love interest, the unflappable Lucy Morgan, react to George’s arrogance and assholery, and how does it change as George’s luck goes against him? Along with the citizens of the unnamed midwestern city, are we gleeful or mournful about the Ambersons’ looming comeuppance? And what does that answer say about us?
By seeing how George treats people, readers are given a look at the vast importance of kindness and generosity in our relationships. Sometimes, it takes an opposing perspective to clearly see what’s right. I’ll let you find out if George ultimately learns this lesson.
For the ways that Booth Tarkington presents these big-time questions, and for the surprisingly readable prose (as compared to other books of the era), The Magnificent Ambersons is certainly worth reading for who likes social novels dealing with class and status. I really enjoyed it and am looking forward to reading the second of his Pulitzer-winning novels, Alice Adams.
About the art
Keith Haring (1958-1990) was a pop artist whose work emerged from NYC’s graffiti subculture of the 1980s. Late in that decade, he created and donated this iconic logo to Best Buddies International. The organization’s founder said this about the work of art:
“It is hard to imagine any artist who could have captured the spirit and mission of Best Buddies better than the Pop Artist Keith Haring. His artwork is so simple and spot-on in capturing the concepts of friendship, togetherness and one person helping another. You just look at the Best Buddies logo and your heart beats a bit faster—you can feel the power of friendship coming to life right before your eyes. I will never forget meeting Haring in his studio in New York City in the late 1980’s. I was a college student and he was an artist I admired and followed. He didn’t know me from a hole-in-the-wall, but he had a family member with special needs and understood the significance of the Best Buddies mission. He knew what a friend meant in his life and his family member’s life. He immediately told me he wanted to help and asked if he could donate our logo. The rest is history—and a form of magic. I will always be in debt to Haring for his creative genius and generosity.”
Thanks so much for reading! I deeply appreciate the time and inbox space.
-Jeremy
Jeremy! I love the idea of starting with art each week. How lovely! I'm excited to see what you choose each time.
Our daughter was involved with Best Buddies (BB) in high school, and my husband and I often wear BB string backpacks with the Haring logo on the back when we’re out and about. We get so many compliments on them!